How many of you are on Timehop? How many of you look back at your memories that Facebook pops up everyday? It’s always interesting to see how much can change in a year. A lot can happen in your life, family’s life, and dynamics changing in a family within a year. Looking back at where my life was a year ago makes me realize that to keep on going and moving forward is the way to go in life. See, it was a year ago that we learned that Jasmine had Masticatory Muscle Mitosis (otherwise known as MMM). There were other personal struggles going on as well that I was dealing with a year ago.
One Year ago today…
Jasmine was at the Vet to be tested for MMM, one year ago. I remember begging for prayers for God to heal her or just let something be stuck in her jaw. It’s hard to see your family member suffer and it was a very painful experience. Not only that, but there were some personal issues going on in my life that I struggled with. It’s so funny to look back at where I was a year ago in my life. Of course, a year ago I was so stressed out that I couldn’t look towards the future. I just couldn’t understand why….
Why didn’t god answer my prayers?
This….. it’s not necessarily God didn’t answer our prayers. But rather that our prayers weren’t answered in the way that we want or expected them to be answered. It’s easy to “think” we know God’s plan for our life, but in reality we don’t know. But we do know that God is in control and that he has a plan for our life. I remember a year ago praying so hard that God would just heal Jasmine or just let something be stuck in her jaw. Why does she have to suffer with this horrible disease? What if it couldn’t be cured? Will she ever be able to open her jaw wide again? Will she ever be able to have full function of her mouth again? The worry was ever present in my mind. Pain and suffering isn’t exempt from this life but there is something called, hope.
Hope is defined as: “a feeling of trust”
Anxiety, worry, fear, the unknown future, angst, foreboding, trepidation, fright, and dread go through our thoughts and minds. In our day and age in our lives, we seem to live off of anxiety, fear, and dread. A lot of people dread going to work everyday. There is the fear of living pay check to pay check. The anxiety of not knowing what the future holds. But there is a way to cope with that and it’s hope. Hope for a future…. God’s plans are to prosper us, but we must seek him and trust him. Trust is something that’s hard for many people to deal with. But walking in obedience and learning to trust and obey is key.
4 months later….
Remember hope and praying? I was devastated that Jasmine did indeed have MMM. I am not going to lie, but I felt hopeless. Why would God allow this to happen in my life? It felt like my life was crumbling around me at this time. My hopes, dreams, and future seemed to be completely down the drain. I felt like I was at rock bottom. I look back and I wish I could tell myself a year ago that everything is going to be more than fine, just trust in him. But, I was too busy worried about things I had no control over. 4 months later Jasmine was completely healed from MMM. I think part of that was due to Sofia helping her “overcome” her obstacles. It may sound silly but it is true!
Looking back BUT keep moving forward…
Don’t dwell on your current situation or your past for too long. It’s okay to look back at the struggles you faced but keep your outlook towards the future. Know that there are better days ahead, even if it doesn’t feel like it. Life is ever changing and it’s too short to feel miserable or down. I look back at how much sorrow and pain I was in a year ago. Now though, I couldn’t be happier in my life. I know if it wasn’t for the struggles that I went through I wouldn’t be as happy as I am now. If you are in a dark place or a place of sorrow or pain keep your chin up. Focus on the hope of tomorrow, hope of the future, and the beauty of what lies ahead of you.
Keep Moving Forward…..
Live Today hope for tomorrow
My struggles are part of who I am. It’s so easy to read this blog but not fully understand it. I was there a year ago, I know how it feels. You feel so hopeless, pain, sorrow, and your heart aches. Live out your life today as you won’t get today back. Run a marathon, half marathon, 10k, 5k, or even just a mile if you feel like it. Be the best of who you are even in the tough times. I promise you to keep your head up is so worth it. It’s okay to be weak in the moments but know that there will be a light at the end of the tunnel.
I heard from countless people telling me that everything would be so much better after the dark times in my life were over. At the time I just couldn’t wrap my head around it. Happiness in life is based upon your reaction to stressors in life. If you want to be miserable then feel miserable all the time. But if you want to be happy then be positive and upbeat. No one likes to be around a negative individual so be the person who everyone wants to be around. Be the happy, upbeat, positive friend that those who are hurting around you need.
Live. Laugh. Love.
Be a light to those in your life today. You never know who is facing a difficult time or trial. Some people are great at hiding their trials and could just use a friend. Be that friend….
To read the post that announced her diagnosis click here.